"And there was Evening;" Pressure on His Light in us

The ebb and flow of bad times with good can determine the reality or strength of our faith, faithfulness. The quality and permanence of our walk with God must cycle through evening and morning. As I read through and study Genesis, there are many spiritual truths we can pull out without eisegeses, butchering the text, or adding too much of what "the text means to me." The New Testament allows for many spiritual realities from the Creation narrative to be pulled into our walk with Christ. And I am taking the liberty.

When I was a young Christian, my hope in Jesus fluctuated with my surroundings and my emotions. The most dynamic experience of that was the excitement of a retreat. The youthfulness of my walk came with enthusiasm as I departed for a retreat. I looked forward to the good feelings that came along with it, the jubilation of the beatific environment, the wonderment of the teaching that fed my ego. The balloon of emotion grew round and floated me right up to heaven, figuratively. The ride home was a vibrant reminiscing of all that I had learned and was inspired to put into practice. When I was either dropped back off at the church or, in later days, after dropping other ladies off, I went into my house, and all the joy not only left my heart but fell off my face as if a maladroit being had taken possession of my body. The light of the retreat, in a moment, had turned to evening, and nothing I learned or knew would be practiced in that moment. It was gone because my emotions had been attacked by real life. Then the evening and morning of life had come, and I was left with a choice how to put into practice what I learned or denounce all I knew by what I was experiencing in what was an evening circumstance.

My "evening" was marked by hurt feelings, no one greeting me with kisses and hugs, possibly the kids' rooms not being cleaned, and not being asked, "Mommy," or "Honey, what did you learn and how can we become more of the people who will make you happy?" All selfish things that my flesh clung to in my early walk with Jesus. I know you can relate, and may even still experience it, as we have grown through our sanctification.

In Matthew 13 we read the parable of the "Sower and the Seed" in verses "²⁰ As for what was sown on rocky ground, this is the one who hears the word and immediately receives it with joy, ²¹ yet he has no root in himself, but endures for a while, and when tribulation or persecution arises on account of the word, immediately he falls away. ²² As for what was sown among thorns, this is the one who hears the word, but the cares of the world and the deceitfulness of riches choke the word, and it proves unfruitful." I get it if this passage does not appear, at first glance, to have anything to do with Genesis 1, which speaks a myriad of times, saying, "There was evening, and there was morning..." as I am referencing it.

Our Christian walk does go back and forth, wrestling to walk in the Light as Jesus called us to do and to be. Sometimes this happens through rebellious actions, and at times we are responding to the testing of our faith. In sharing the above parable, Jesus warned his disciples about the obstacles to their faith, or faithfulness to him. There is a panoply of warnings and communications by Jesus and the Apostles concerning "the evening" of testing that will put pressure on us to persevere in the faith. Testing, as spoken of in Matthew 13, puts our faith under tension and brings clarity to the ground on which the seed has fallen. In Psalm 23:4, David, with hope, states, "Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff they comfort me." We know Jesus has defeated death and darkness, yet they still impact the earth in its current decayed condition. We do face the "Shadow of death and darkness," but the reality is that they are defeated and without power.

We know that, but when we face them, we forget they have no power. Therefore, we fall into temptation, because as Jesus says, "The spirit is willing, but your flesh is weak; watch and pray that you do not fall into temptation." These are truths we learn as we grow in Christ. Yet, in Genesis, with every "there was evening," comes "and there was morning." This phrasing is not accidental. I believe God had Moses phrase it as such, for one, the Jewish days go from evening to morning, while ours go from morning to evening, but also, with any darkness or trial, "The earth was without form and void" comes, and "God spoke and said, 'Let there be Light.'" The morning always comes. Our problem is that we lose hope in whatever the evening brings, and we forget that he will say, "Let there be Light," even if that light is bringing us into His Glory forevermore, our physical death.

Also, as I read through Genesis, I asked, "Why does Earth need the moon?" The moon has no light in and of itself. Now I am sure there are some scientific reasons the moon is necessary. There are times the moon is hidden behind clouds, but stars are still visible. Yes, while it is dark, there is still some light. The reason there is light is due to the moon's presence, even behind an obstacle. Though the moon is not an illuminating star, it reflects the sun's light, and depending on how clear the sky is, it gives more or less light. The moon's cycles also bring more illumination to Earth. As I meditated on the study of the creation of the earth, I began to see the spiritual application of all that God did and how it speaks to what He is doing in those who become His spiritual offspring.

When we come into the family of God, Jesus tells us to be light, as he is Light. Of course, like the moon reflects the sun, having no light of its own, we, too, having no light of our own, must reflect Jesus into a lost and dying, dark world. We must face dark times, or evenings of our own, so the reflection of Jesus through us becomes brighter. The reflection has to be separated from the cloud of our emotions, as I learned from retreat expectations. If our feelings are the primary substance of our faith, we will live in the darkness of the evening, angry and disappointed with God. God can use that to help us grow up by bringing us relief through morning times, trials ending, and allowing us to exhale.

For many trials are severe, and appear unending, but God promises, "and there was morning..."

How do we reconcile that? Maturity!

Matthew 13 offers four examples of seed that falls on various grounds. The last seed's outcome, "As for what was sown on good soil, this is the one who hears the word and understands it. He indeed bears fruit and yields, in one case a hundredfold, in another sixty, and in another thirty.” "The evening" is not meant to pull us away, or cause us to fall away, or be unfruitful. The purpose of all the warnings in Scripture is, as Peter says, "Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you." He tells us evening is coming, and it is dark, "fiery trial." Just as we read over and over in Genesis, evening turns to morning, but they come and will not stop until time ends. Trials will come and will not stop until Jesus returns or takes you and me home. Evening comes to put pressure on our faithfulness in Christ Jesus; the light we are reflecting must have obstacles of feelings, rebellion, and ignorance removed so that we can shine brighter.

I realized over time that a retreat was not supposed to conform my family to my emotional expectations. They were not in a weekend huddled by topography that revealed the glory of God, among women who were living their perfect moments, with teaching meant to meet a need. I was! God was using that morning moment in life to cause me to reflect His Son's brightness, not change my family. It was in real life, in the evening of circumstance, that the reflection should have been bright. My expectations dulled the work God had done in the day. As soon as I recognized God meant for me to be changed, so that I can live out His fruit, Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self-control, and reflect that into my family as a I reared my children, so they would grow up and understand how to live godly lives in the "There was evening..." moments, because over time the evenings got darker. More complex circumstances hit my life, and how I would reflect the Light of the Son would be put to the test. Being tossed by my emotions or steadied by God's Word would take on, in "The evenings" that confronted me.

I was happy that God used retreats to teach me about the expectations of what He was up to, so when real dark times came, I could teach my children that mine was good soil, that produced a fruitful harvest of righteousness, In every evening I knew without a doubt, this is only a "Shadow of the valley of death," and "There was morning" coming. It never failed! The reflection of Jesus was not distorted. Though there is still work to be done. We can be sure another "There was evening" will come around as sure as the Earth rotates, and will put pressure on His Light in me. You can count on it, too!